I am very sad to think that there are LDS couples out there that think married sex is impure or unholy in some way.
I was confused, at first, about whether my passion fit in with the law of chastity. That seemed like something of an oxymoron. In the back of my mind, I worried that I shouldn’t be doing this or that with my husband in bed. I worried that I shouldn’t be giving and receiving so much pleasure. I worried about a lot of things. Now, these worries were not factually based; not really. I was manufacturing things to worry about. I have never read a single thing that says we shouldn’t have great sex. Nothing. As a youth, I had heard vague rumors about this being bad and that being bad. Not from authorities, mind you, just from other youth. They might have got this misinformation from their parents; they might have thought it up themselves.
I’m not confused anymore.
I am not confused because I prayed. I prayed and prayed for my sex life to be good, and for me to enjoy it. And for me to want it. And to not feel somewhere, in the back of my mind, like I was sinning in some way. And my prayers were answered. I didn’t feel guilty about the sexual activities my husband and I were participating in. My marriage improved. Our sex life improved. I’m not really sure which came first, the better sex or the better marriage. But I know they go hand in hand.
My message today is this: If you want to improve your marriage, improve your sex life. If you want to improve your sex life, pray about it A LOT and practice!
Yes, God wants you to pray to Him. He wants to help you and guide you and be there for you in all important aspects of your life. I’m not sure that if you prayed about which can of peas to buy that you would get an answer, because it just might not matter. But sex in our marriages?? THAT matters A LOT! From what I’ve read and discovered and experienced first hand, it can be one of the biggest points of contention in a marriage. And it can be one of the best and most uplifting parts of a marriage. So it’s important. Important enough to pray about. Don’t let your feelings of embarrassment cause you to shy away from this. You might be embarrassed to talk to your mom or dad about it, but Heavenly Father CREATED sex. He commanded us to join together and become ONE FLESH. And there’s nothing to be embarrassed about with Him; He knows our thoughts, words and deeds already. Pray to him. Certainly He’ll be there for you.