Warning: This may be too graphic for some people. Also, I sincerely hope this post does not come off as titillating in any way.
What about anal sex? Can we do that? Well, I’m just a regular girl, but I say I’ve never heard anything stating that we can’t. Hebrews 13:4 says “Marriage is honourable in all, and the bed undefiled: but whoremongers and adulterers God will judge.“ (italics and bold mine.) What happens in the bedroom of a married couple is undefiled. So my personal opinion is, if you want it, do it.
What it comes right down to is personal preference. Some people really like anal sex. Some people think about it and fantasize about it and wish they could do it. I hate to break it to you, guys, but I think most women just don’t like it and just don’t want to do it. My best friend, who is very adventurous in bed, says, Oh, nooooooo, no, no, no, that’s exit only. Another girlfriend says she let her husband do it once and she was constipated for a week and that was the end of that. One of my friends hates the semen leakage. A couple other girls I know barely tolerate it on occasion. I don’t have any girlfriend telling me it’s her favorite thing or even in the top ten. And those are non-member friends. They don’t dislike it because they think it’s wrong, it’s just not for them.
Now, honestly, I don’t think I could bring myself to ask any of the sisters in my ward if they do it or if they like it. It’s still so very, very taboo. That’s not to say no one’s doing it. Go over to themarriagebed.com and read the thousands of posts in the “All things Anal” forum. On second thought, maybe you shouldn’t go over there. It depends on what you really want to know about anal play and sex. If you’d rather not learn all the things people do, stay far away. I learned some things I wish I could UN-learn. But that’s not the point of this post.
My personal opinion of anal sex is that it is up to the woman whether or not it’s on the list. We’re the ones that have to have a penis inserted into our rectum, after all. If your wife says absolutely not, well, then, just console yourself with realizing that it is not the be all end all of sex. It may just be the thought of it is much more exciting than the actual act. There could be lots of different reasons why a woman doesn’t want to do it.
First and foremost, it can be VERY PAINFUL. The first time we tried it I about hit the ceiling it hurt so much. We didn’t use enough lube and we didn’t ease into it. Next, the thought of DH’s penis coming out with feces on it is extremely disgusting and embarrassing. Then there are the things I mentioned above that could happen–constipation and semen leakage. Now throw in a hemorrhoid or two. Oh, now THAT’S attractive. Might even be painful. I’m sure there are more.
However, if a couple wants to do it, go for it! I am one who finds it arousing. IF the conditions are right. I have to be absolutely sure there is nothing in there that is going to come out on my DH’s penis. If that’s the case, then I find it incredibly erotic to offer my husband ANYTHING he wants. Give him permission to go anywhere, do anything, and let him take charge. Make me feel just a bit dominated, maybe. Here’s the rub. He is ambiguous about anal sex. I told him I was writing a post about anal sex and asked him how much he liked it. Turns out he does it because I like it, not necessarily because he likes it. He doesn’t dislike it, but doesn’t care one way or another. He said, well, it’s tighter, obviously, and feels nice and there’s a certain thrill to it, but I can’t do what I want. I can’t thrust hard and I can’t really go for it at climax. So actually, the once in a while that we do it is for me. Conan the Barbarian is sure nice!
What about anal play? Well, I don’t know for sure, but from what I’ve read, lots of women like that and are much more open to doing it than the whole enchilada. Especially if they are super aroused. Sometimes I get some wizzbang Os while that is going on.
What about anal play on a man? Well, I’ve also read that many men really like it. But I’ll tell you right now, you wouldn’t catch me dead anywhere near that part of my hubby. Sorry. Years and years ago I read an article in Cosmo that said if you really want to give your guy the orgasm of his life, just put your finger in his anus at the right time and BLAMO. I was shocked. I checked with Conan and he put the brakes on THAT. Thank heavens!!! The technical stuff is something about the prostate and it causing intense pleasure to hit it just right. I’m pretty sure that’s true, because that’s one of the things that’s very popular to discuss over at themarriagebed.com. So if you wanna try it, you might like it!
Anal sex isn’t for everybody, but for those who like it, it’s really good.