Nobody’s Perfect

Last night Conan *gasp* hurt my feelings.

I initiated, and he said no.  I teased him about “therapy” and he snapped, “No!  I am too stressed out and you need to understand that!”  And he left the room (he just went in the bathroom, actually).

Hmmm.  That’s not the way my happy little blog about stress and sex made it out to be, is it?

So I called in to him, “you hurt my feelings!”  When he came out he said, “Turn on some music, babe.”  Me:   “No.  You don’t have to, and I don’t want to anymore.”  *pouts*

So he said, “Well, I do, now.”  I told him I wanted to slap him silly.  He said, “I’m going to make you melt into a puddle before I’m through with you,” and other descriptive,  very interesting things.

I believe he made it up to me.

Just telling you this to highlight that even the best posts don’t always work exactly as planned.  And even if we’d gone to bed just to sleep last night, things would have been okay.  Nobody’s perfect.  But keep trying!

7 thoughts on “Nobody’s Perfect

    • Cute, CM! It crossed my mind for a second or two, it really did! But it really was worth my while!

      (On a serious note, I’ve made a commitment to myself not to say no to him ever again. That’s been working very well for us.)

  1. Thanks for the link. I will check it out.

    What saddens me the most about my situation (that I personally created) is that I threw away the prime time of our sexual life. While things are really good in the sex arena now, we are both dealing with aging issues that do affect this part of our life. (We are in our early 50’s and let’s just say that the days of a good quickie are long gone. lol) Also, I have recently been diagnosed with a progressive debilitating disease, that while it is not affecting our sexual life right now, it most likely will down the road.

    I am not looking for sympathy – as the sympathy really goes to my husband who very lovingly and patiently lived in a sexual desert with me for so many years – not by his choice or preference. I believe he has earned sainthood!

    My creating the sexual desert in our marriage was wrong, selfish, and in many ways downright evil, but not intentional. While I did not purposely or knowingly set out to conduct our sexual life the way I did, the results and consequences are still the same. At the time I did not realize how much damage I was doing to our relationship or marriage and to myself and husband. I am not excusing myself, but I suffered greatly from the “good girl syndrome”. I could not reconcile being sexual and being spiritual. So I chose being spiritual (that’s a laugh isn’t it?) and turned myself off sexually. I really really did not understand during that time how important sex is to men and to marriages. I naively believed that because I could go without it for the most part – so could he and sex just was not that important at all. So I tolerated it when I allowed it to happen, occasionally had orgasms – definitely was not open or adventurous.

    As I write this, I am still amazed my husband handled it the way he did.
    I wish there was some way I could get to other women (and men) who are doing what I did. But I know it would do no good. I would not have listened back then. Like Outside the Norm said, “nothing will ever change when you marry a woman with no interest in sex who thinks that to have an interest would make her unrighteous.” That is how I was. Fortunately I did change. it just took me a long long time. And now I live with many many regrets!

    Sorry i didn’t intend to ramble so much. I think what you are doing with this blog is great. I think this blog should be mandatory Relief Society reading. lol

    • CM,
      You’re not alone in not understanding how important sex is to marriage and most men. I didn’t get it, either. Just like you, I thought that because I didn’t have a strong desire for it, and couldn’t relate to someone being horny, that I was normal and he was not. And, well, sex is just a want, right? No one dies from lack of sex, right? Marriage isn’t about sex, right? Our sex saturated society is the reason he’s obsessed, right? And on and on. And I didn’t suffer from the “good girl syndrome”. But no one was telling us what we really needed to know when we were just getting started in life!

      Hmnmm, this has the makings of a good post. The wheels of my brain are turning.

      Anyway, we have a long time to work on ourselves, and thank goodness for that!

      And thanks so much for the compliment!

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